*trigger warning: I talk about sexual abuse in this post* It’s a constant battle within my brain to not blame myself for the things he did. I prayed the other night–seeking comfort, but all I felt was guilt. I told myself I didn’t have the right to talk to God about how I felt… Continue reading When You Blame Yourself
*Trigger warning: I discuss sexual abuse in this post* I hate not knowing how to feel…except for numb…that’s mostly what I feel (when it comes to one situation, anyways)… I had blocked something out of my mind several months ago. Thing is–I wrote about it (thanks a lot, past Rae), in detail, the day after… Continue reading When You Don’t Want To Remember.
There are so many things I want to write about right now. I’ve been lacking in inspiration, or motivation. But also I’ve been dealing with depression and anxiety more than usual. I’m fighting my way through it and learning a whole lot. But I’ve been introverting a lot for the past couple of weeks and it’s been helpful.… Continue reading What Goes on Behind the Scenes?
There are things I used to love that I now hate There are smells that make me sick that I once craved I flinch every time someone touches me a certain way You’ve been gone for a while but these scars remain I knew how toxic you were but I still stayed And I feel… Continue reading Show yourself some grace
When things ended with Mack, we were supposed to stay friends. Hah. Because obviously that works all of the time. I’ve learned SO much from our relationship. Two weeks after things ended I got a text from Todd that it looked like Mack was with someone at the bar…I was going to the bar that… Continue reading Emulate Your Expectations
It’s the silent killer you don’t expect to meet. It tells you you’re worthless and you don’t mean a thing. It walks you down the path of darkness, And it makes you feel: Hopeless… Helpless… Homeless… “Why even try?” It will ask. Then it hands you your “fake-smile” mask. It tells you that no one… Continue reading The Deceiver Named Depression
So…let me tell you a little bit about my life for the past month or so… February-March-life was great. Mack and I were doing great (so I thought), school was alright…work was pretty stressful, as always, but I was turning in my resignation, so I wasn’t worried about it too much. Life was overall looking good… Continue reading What a Time to be Alive…